Husband in the kitchen: Tuna Pasta (Serves:2 ; Preparation Time: 45 minutes)

Guest Blogger: Amit Rajvanshy

If you are a girl/women/prettier one, stop reading ahead - NOW! 

OK, my fellow boys and men, this 'complex', super sumptuous recipe, is a sure shot girl friend/wife pleaser! It's an age old secret passed on from one generation of great men to the other.  So, please keep this secret - don't be the first one in history to be breaking the 'bro code'!! 



(
Article 4 of the Bro Code: A Bro never divulges the secret of another bro to a woman. It is a sacred document not to be shared with chicks for any reason...no not even that reason.)

All right boys, here is your trump card that you can play in those nerve wrecking situations! You know that so familiar Sunday afternoon feeling, when a super exciting 20:20 match is coming up in 45 mins.......and, she had been wanting to go shopping all afternoon - AND, you sooo desperately need that ONE trump card, that one invincible girl pleaser plan! 

So here it goes. 45 mins and the clock is ticking....here we go
  • 45 minutes to the toss
    • Jump out from your bed, startle her a with a kiss and announce that you are giving her a memorable surprise this afternoon, and that its her lucky day today!!
    • Throw on your tee and jeans, grab your wallet and zoom to your nearby super market
    • Go right to the shelf where they stack all those fancy canned stuff - pick up a SEALECT Tuna can - click here to know about the one I am talking about (any other would do too, just make sure its Tuna in Oil and not in Brine)
    • Also garb a pack of Fusilli pasta on the way out 
    • At the check out counter, don't 'check-out' that tight jeans clad chic for too long - remind yourself, Dhoni and his men are counting on you! Sorry girl, I have my priorities set today.
  • T- 35 minutes

    • Back home, hit the kitchen right away, don your cooking apron and boil  in 1.5 litres of water in a large vessel; thrown in a table spoon of salt
    • In the interim, finely chop 1 large onion and 1 medium tomato - if you cut your finger (s) apply some ice, instantly
    • Take out Mayonnaise and Tabasco sauce from the closet/fridge
  • T- 40 minutes
     
    • Open the Tuna can near the washbasin/sink (you are sure to spill the oil - all men spill food, so you are good, my brother!)
    • Once you have drained the oil away, fork out the tuna in a large glass bowl/container and mince it fine
    • Check out the water on the stove - it must be boiling now; add a few drops of olive oil into the water (this prevents the pasta from meshing up, when boiled)
    • Now cut open the pasta packet and submerge about 150 gms pasta  into the boiling water; stir  gently and set a stop watch to 10 minutes

  • T- 3o minutes

    • Wipe your sweat, assure yourself that you won't miss the match, say a quick prayer, shout out "I love you" to your wife/girl friend and get back to work, man
    • Add the chopped onion, tomatoes, pitted black olives to minced tuna and mix it well
    • Add about 4 tablespoons of Mayo and 8-10 drops of Tabasco chilly sauce to this  mixture; blend all ingredients well

  • T-25 minutes

    • If ten minutes are up, turn off the gas, drain the pasta into a colander and run loads of cold water over the pasta; do it gently, else you may end up breaking the pasta
    • Now bring the Pasta into the Tuna/Onion/Tomato/Olives/Mayo/Tabasco mixture and mix very carefully

  • T- 20 minutes

    • Crush some pepper corn and salt (to taste) into the mixture
    • Do you have any of those condiments left from your last Dominoes Pizza order? If yes, sprinkle about one sachet into the mixture. Alternatively, scramble through the kitchen closets and find a spice marked "dry herbs" - sprinkle about 1 teaspoon

  • T-10 minutes

    • Taste your dish - if you have followed the recipe, you will have an winning smile
    • Park the dish in deep freezer for 5 mins

  • T-5 minutes

    • Your heart is thumping, only 5 minutes to the toss - would she love it?
    • Plate your dish, don a big smile and walk up to her

  • T-3 minutes

    • Tell her how pretty she looks, how hard working she is and finally........ how much she cares for things that you like! 
    • Serve her the dish and make a wish -

    Honey, you know it's that all important, super crucial 20:20 match on TV right now - can I watch it???

    Tell me if it worked...cheers and good luck, buddy!

    Comments

    Sujata Barua said…
    Sorry for ignoring the statutory warning at the beginning and reading on...but I must say this is an innovative recipe, just the right dollops of humor & flavor :)
    Cant wait to surprise my family with this tuna specialty...Ishita please pass on to Amit that I am pleasantly surprise at this achievement..honestly didn’t expect him to be a maestro chef!! And do put up few chinese recipes if possible, Chinese is an eternal favorite of mine..Thanks !!
    Ishita said…
    Amit does surprise me with his culinary skills once in a while, why don't you pass on this recipe to your bf and let him do the same ;-)
    Nitya said…
    I just love the way you have posted this one.
    You are Supercute!! Love to Amit :)
    Natasha said…
    Finally, I read Amit's famous Tuna Pasta salad recipe without caring about the fact that I am a woman!!! He has been promising us this salad for years but never made it for us.

    BTW, I like it and will try it soon... flattering??? ;)
    Ishita said…
    Oh! I am sure you'll love it...Amit will surely be flattered and who knows you may get lucky and he prepares salad for you this time when you visit us...!!

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